Flash Fiction by Wendy Platt
Mechanical sex; what is that to you? Probably not the same thing it is to me.
I’m talking about pistons and rods, carburetors and camshafts, headers and injectors.
The sleek stance of a charcoal grey 2000 740iL rev’s up my thoughts of long-distance joyrides with the cruise control on at a very cushy 85mph.
Nothing can make my heart pump like gripping the stick of 24kGo, a 2013 Focus ST in Tangerine Scream; with both feet on gas and clutch, swiftly shifting through the gears up to 120 mph, the little 4 cylinder taking on its bigger V8 brethren, the ‘Stang, always so chicken and backing down after reaching into the red at 100 mph. Radar Love!
There’s the sultry seduction of playing footsy by placing lightest touch on the gas pedal of a mountain dew colored 2014 Porsche Cayenne GTS and having it take my heart and soul smoothly, rapidly, with it upwards to 125mph, on the backroads of the Arbuckles on a gloriously cloudless sunny Sunday morning.
In my 44 years of driving, I’ve owned more than 75 vehicles – from a ’63 Falcon to the Series I Discovery, from a Chevy Laguna to a Ford Festiva. I’ve owned imports and convertibles; Sunday drivers, gas guzzlers and daily commuters. I’ve loved them all (just about) because, I’m a Gear-Head.
But my favorite? My total O-car? That would be my Pink 2013 Smart Passion 4Two.
Why? Because this vehicle brings absolute joy no matter where I go. It knows no race, age, or gender boundary. It is a Universal Lover. People every single day, anywhere I drive my Smart, tell me: “I like your car.”
Whether Young/Old, Black/White, Gay/Straight, or something in between any of those, Pinky is always loved and a lover back. It’s such an incredibly euphoric feeling when you make a total stranger smile.
And me? In case you’re curious? I’m just a woman.
So, Let’s Do It.
A Partner Should… by Emmerson Rose Quigley
A-Always adore you
B-Be there for you always
C-Carry you when you are tired
D-Decide where to eat when you don’t know
E-Enjoy all of the movies you force them to watch
F-Fidget with your hair when you want them near
G-Gently rub your back
H-Hug you when you least expect it
I-Initiate date night
J-Joke around when you are in a playful mood
K-Kiss you when you least expect it
L-Let you choose what to watch
M-Mock the people you don’t like
N-Never not be on your side
O-Occupy you when you are bored
P-Play with the kids when you are too tired
Q-Quickly give you compliments after a rough day
R-Reason your case to someone against you
S-Sit next to you when there’s barely any room
T-Turn the house upside down looking for something you lost
U-Understand all the gibberish you speak
V-Vow to always love you
W-Willingly go shopping with you
(E)X-Exemplify their love of you to all of their friends
Y-Yell the loudest for you at any event
Z-Zap your grumpiness away